Lawn mower humor

Last year when visiting brother Josh in Pensacola, he told me he wasn't going to borrow things from people anymore because they always break while he has them: now he has something broken and the lender ends up with a new item (at his expense).

Now it's my turn.

So I needed another lawn mower (new year, new mower--this is getting to be a trend). Enter brother Mark who suddenly has a glut of mowers from the Parkers. So I don't want to buy something big right away, so, says he, just borrow it for a while to see if you want this old Allis Chalmers.

So I cart it home on Easter Sunday. Next week, I enjoy cutting my grass with a 4' mower deck. Hey, this is cool, I feel like I've got a real tractor here.

So last week I get it out for cutting number 2. Now I'm 90% done with the lawn and bang, boom, mower stops driving and a bolt comes flying out the discharge chute. Aw nuts (and bolts)!

The thing weighs a ton (seems like), so I come-a-long it into the shed for the night. Remember this is my 69 hours away from home week, so it sits until last night.

Monday night: finish cutting the lawn with the electric weed wacker (3 extension cords stuck together--now there's a great idea); next time I'll try the scissors.

Crawl under mower to see where flying bolt originated: lucky me, I just sheared the drive shaft collar & bolts off the back of the motor and bent the shaft.

Today: now I'm online trying to find parts for a 32 year old mower made by a company that no longer exists. So far I've found the drive shaft ($78), a bushing ($9.81), a fiberglass collar ($17.43) and I'm now waiting for a call back from the parts company to see if they have the sheared-off thingy from the Kohler motor (any guesses on how much that might be, if they even have it)? Hold that thought--he literally just called--good news, they have it; and the price? just $120.

I think you already know what the moral of the story is. . .

. . .get rid of the grass and plant concrete.